Half my day was playing Civ 3 on my laptop (because I can), the other half reading more Worms, so once more, not really a productive day. OH WELL.

Tomorrow's my dentist appointment.

Since I stopped brushing the moment I got sick--which, you may recall, was for three months...not long after my last dentist appointment--this is going to be bad.

Really bad.

I had multiple spots at risk of developing cavities if my brushing habits didn't improve last visit--they got worse.

Time for a wakeup call.

​Doesn't suck any less knowing it's coming. If anything, makes it worse.

...*ahem*

...By which, I mean, snowmageddon finally released me from its grip; I can now get out, and have returned to work.

​Life should normalize soon!

What I mainly did is knock out as many badges as I could that I didn't have earned for the quests I don't have completed which there may be even some semblance of a chance I ever can get. Some games I just can't get the "medium" badges for (they're not, they're hard or even impossible), other games are possible but tedious, other games are just obnoxious (but fully possible), then there's the games where I can play them just fine, I just need to be in the right frame of mind.

For instance, legit fun fact: the one and only time I've been scared playing a video game, it was a kongregate game that was doing the scaring. There's point and click horror games that are just so atmospheric that they actually send chills down my spire and I get legit terrified during them. I have to get the right mood of, "it's just a game it's just a game" because they get me so invested that I actually get scared.

Mind you, some of that fear is born of "if they have a mechanic to kill me...how much progress will I lose?", not to mention, how many tries will it take for me to do this without being killed, butstill. Good horror games actually exist on kongregate where the horror isn't gore, where the horror isn't in monsters, isn't jumpscares, isn't a bunch of other cliches of the genre, but where you build investment and interest in both your own character and the world around where there's a lot of time where there's no sense of imminent danger--so that when you want to give the scares, the sudden sense of danger is all the more horrifying.

Basically, if you have a sense of danger where none exists, it can work but usually won't; if you have a constant sense of danger, it'll never work; if you have no sense of danger when danger exists (jumpscares), that's cheap and isn't real horror; if you have no sense of danger when none exists, but suddenly during the parts where there is danger, you can sense it...

...That is horror, and those are the kinds of games that are so good that I am legit scared of playing them.

And there's a few of those, too.

Butyeah, I knocked out about ten games, and even finished a quest! (And due to my absolute stubbornness, nailed one of the two hard badges as a bonus for a game--the other hard badge should frankly be rated as an impossible one because even if you had a walkthrough, which none exist as far as I know, it wouldn't REALLY be possible to get because it requires absolute precision of a ludicrous nature.)

Or would that be, snows its true colors?

...*cough*

By that, I mean: even with the private road plowed.
Even with our driveway shoveled for two days straight.
Even with rain melting snow, more and more and more.

Our best car struggled to get out. We picked up my mom, did dinner, got gas, shopped, and went home, but that one trip was such that we've deemed it too dangerous to make more, at least tomorrow. So I'm yet again, trapped--trapped for a solid week. With a small taste of freedom, but only a glimpse.

Snowmageddon looks like it is in recession. Knocked out my power yesterday and we maxed out at 17 inches of snow.

We're still snowed in, mind you, but at least the power's back and it looks like the snow's slowly melting.

So I was supposed to go to work today.
Supposed to.

Literally our best car, four wheel drive with studded tires, couldn't make it out, because we got six inches of new snow.

On top of the snow which was already there.

Keep in mind the original first snowfall was six and a half inches.
Even with the snow melting, not all of that snow was gone by the time this new snow was here.

So when I say six inches of new snow.

You can add a couple inches give or take to the total, for like eight inches of solid snow.

It's a lot of snow.

And it's still​ snowing now.

So far, power and internet hold, but it continues to snow more. and more. and more. and more. We'll have to see if my luck holds.

Officially, my excuse is that snowmageddon, as I call it, knocked out my internet--which is true.

Unofficially, since my internet came back some indeterminable amount of time later, my excuse is...
...Uhhh...
...Hmm there has to be a good one...

...It didn't come back until I was otherwise indisposed?

Sure, yeah, let's run with that.

I wrote a poem for my grandmother today, for a special occasion. My mom wanted me to write it a week ago--I had an iota of inspiration on Friday, but if faded before I got something real. I kinda sorta had something on Sunday, too, but I immediately forgot it. On all other days...absolutely nothing, no inspiration whatsoever.

But today, I just...clicked.

Something about work makes me able to do this.

I don't know what​, but it's there.

If for no other reason than going to work will actually serve to kickstart me into gear. Right now I know my internal engine is dead. I've had all the free time in the world--could blog about anything I want to. Everything. No distractions, no excuses, nothing.

And yet.

I am coming up...empty.

Something about work versus home, different head spaces. When I'm home, I just have this insatiable urge to do a combination of read, play games, and watch videos. And even though I know the moment it ends I'll be kicking myself at the time wasted. "Why the heck didn't I do that while I had the chance?!?" I do want it to end, so that I'll at least be able to have the realization of what I was wasting. A break from the bored monotony.

Sure, yeah, days were beginning to blend together from the monotony of work before.

But then I got my break.

And now things are beginning to blend together from the monotony of not working. It's a balance between being able to shut my brain down and being able to keep it working. Too much work, can't keep it working; too little work, can't shut it down. Or something to that effect anyway.

​Point being, I need to keep working in order to stay sane, because I really don't have anything right now otherwise.

​Kinda pathetic, innit?