All Too Human
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Rambles, Rants, and Musings

Well I don't have much to say right now.

3/13/2017

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...And that has nothing to do with it being half an hour from midnight (rushing against a deadline) with a dozen work-related tabs open clogging my browser that I want to get finished with. (Job applications.) It's more that I just don't have much to say, really.

Which is kind-of sad, but not unexpected. I can't write a long entry every day. Still, I do feel like I owe you the effort to try, since I know I have a bad tendency to make entries-which-aren't-really-entries at least two or three times a week. (Probably one of the reasons my blog is so hard to follow: some entries are literally one-liner snippets of nothingness, followed by an entry which is filled with a continuous wall of text near-impossible to read entirely.)

Apparently my family is beginning to figure out the critter is smarter than they thought, so I haven't said anything to them yet and it looks like they're going to figure it out on their own. (Frankly I think they're going to call a professional at raccoon removal after it continues to not work, even though that will be ridiculously expensive.)

I am also officially enrolled in the spring quarter college class, which means that I will in fact be doing the thing. In this case, the thing being...I'll be going to an LGB group (hopefully T-friendly, but we'll find out quickly enough). It's a bit nerve-wrecking to think about. So many things on my mind.

I also had a mini-meltdown today, where I was feeling ridiculously emotional, but I'm not sure what triggered it exactly. I mean. I vented my anger out enough where I didn't think it was from real-life. Yet that outburst was...pretty dang bad, and half my readers know what I'm talking about.

I'm just very emotional, and while I'm literally wasting hours of my day literally every single day...I feel like I'm somehow simultaneously overextending myself. That I'm getting stressed out, that what I'm doing is too much of one thing at once, which might be why I have neglected things as much as I have.

Pardon the curse word (I probably could think of an alternative phrase if I thought hard enough), but one of the things that my mind has basically been telling me is, "Get your shit together", because I've just...felt like it very visibly hasn't been, I suppose. And it was verbatim those words. (It wasn't me speaking to me, so much as it was one of my alternative mes. I'm not sure which alternative me, the voice who said the words sounded feminine so it might've been one of my female selves, but I can't tell which. It wasn't ME, me, though, because again, I don't use curse words at all. I don't think in them, I don't say them, they just don't come naturally to me.)

​So I probably am doing pretty poorly in life in a lot of ways, even though in some other ways I continue to progress forward. That's about all I can think of to say though.
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    rBree2

    AKA:
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