I've been streaming, I'm working on my novel but not nearly as much as I ought to, I should look into sponsorships, my discord should be set up, my twitch is good, today we made it as a streamer--I've had graphic artist bots before, but today I got followbotted so now I've made it.
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...but I do know where I want to focus.
I want to stop stressing about finances and success. I know I can succeed. As long as I am doing the thing, I will. I may not know what I need to do exactly, I know I still have much to learn, but I also know to manifest it I need to believe I am manifesting it. I need to believe I can. I need to believe I can succeed. I need to stop doubting myself. I have talked the talk--it's time to create. I know what I am aiming to do, so I am going to do it. It will require me to learn things I haven't learned yet (and I'm not sure what), but I am going to do it. I'm not quite clicking with what, but I know what not to think, I know better than to give up. So all I can really do is keep going forward. I'm going to have the success I'm looking forward. The work builds on itself. I can do it. I'm not sure where to learn tbh, and that's an issue I need to fix, but, I will figure it out and go forward. ...I just wanted to write something here.
I don't want to go into details and should keep things vague but something very good happened today with friends of mine. And it lined up with card readings I've been getting for a while. Basically, "let go of the friends you have lost and embrace the good with the friends you still have". Good things happened with my friends, and I am happy. It comes with some sadness of having let go of the friends lost, but I am not going to miss out on my current friendships and the happiness abounding because of thinking about the lost ones. We've found some good things, and I intend to cherish them. These are people who give just as much as I do, and accept me despite my faults, and I the same for them. Good people, vibing together. That's all I really can say rn, gotta go to bed with my fiance, because I don't want to miss out on time with my fiance for the sake of recording this for others. Life is going well. And while I don't have the words to say why, I am truly happy. In a way I didn't think I ever would be. I want to make a real blog in the 20th - 23rd range (you'll see why), so you can look forward to that, but largely, I'm too busy/tired to do much of much.
I got roles working on discord, and twitch stream went well. I can't do much rn, but I'm planning on potentially doing a blog update stream where I idly work on getting my wix blog up to date. It'll need trigger warnings and a recognition I was in a bad mindstate and have grown and progressed and past me isn't current me. But, I still want to do it. (EDIT BEFORE POSTING: ...well maybe next time, cards demanded novelwriting. Very strongly.) I got some really good tarot readings today, basically saying I deserve to be forgiven. I deserve self-love. I deserve to love myself, and be loved by others. I need to be careful not to overextend myself and burn out by taking on too many things at once, and I will only be able to love so many at once, but I am beautiful. I have grown, and those who are or have entered my life see me and love me as I am. I am doing good work and going on a good journey. I wish I could retain specifics from readings better, particularly ones that are as loving and detailed and long and thorough as this one was. But basically, it paired well with the prior thorough reading I got. I need to approach from love, and let go of trying to fix things. I may not know how to speak from a place of love, but I will learn. I will keep trying, and eventually my guides believe I'll succeed, in approaching from love and expressing things through it. I am trying my best. And I am trying to spread self-love. On that note, I had a mantra to help get me get through the morning. My negative emotions are born from pain, and I can wash it away by embracing the love underneath. To explain that, My conscious self has nothing but endless love to give, but my shadow self has negative intrusive feelings and thoughts which despite my best efforts have plagued me. These negative emotions are born from deep pain in me. By recognizing that the negativity originates from pain, I gain some power. And by recognizing that the pain is born from the same love my conscious self has, that underneath the pain is more love, I can master my pain by embracing that love. It seems to be working now for me, so if any here need it, I’m giving it to everyone. Love may cause a great many wounds, but it can heal those very same wounds. 💖 You can do it. I Breelieve in you. Busy, but productive!
I've started mirroring my weebly blog on ko-fi, although unlike the wix mirror blog (which I eventually intend to have all of my blogs mirrored onto), I don't intend to post past blogs there. Just keep going on current ones. I may or may not post to LinkedIn as well, as I am dabbling in professional content creation, so it's technically a job. I'm also doing so for wix, although need a lot of work there. For twitch streams, I downloaded OBS and couldn't get the thing I wanted working but it's there for now. I downloaded the twitch studio platform, and it should in theory work for what I want it to. In theory, I have reactions set up for my discord. So like...I'm doing a lot of good work, which is keeping me busy, and here's to hoping it is finally about to pay off. And while they are difficult, they give a sense of things.
To keep a long story short: This morning, I was in a friend's tarot stream. I had to go on an errand. When I came back, that friend had just raided into another tarot streamer, who offered free readings. I had no idea how good they would be but I decided to see. I've had variants on this question on my mind for months, and most readers give good answers, but not an answer that I can stick by. This one, I might be able to. The reading was both the most brutal yet also most loving reading I have ever gotten. It was the clearest, loudest I have ever gotten. It was exactly honed in. The reader was able to sense the situation perfectly, picking up details in the cards which aren't normally there, having an idea of how to see them. They were very very good at their reading, and it got through, and I can stick to the reading. This reading took like five, ten minutes, and is way way way too long to clip, and I don't think I can really record it start to finish, but some of the loose highlights, loosely; I missed the nuance. I can't fix things, and shouldn't try. I caused great harm. I need to accept accountability. I need to accept my part. I need to give it a large amount of time. I violated a boundary. I crossed a line. Self-love. Self-healing. Self-acceptance. Release. Don't come from a place of trying to fix what was broken; come from a place of pure love. I may not know the nuances I missed (I won't unless I am told), but I can know I missed them. Just knowing I did is enough. (Although I can guess at least a few.) I already knew I couldn't fix things, but when it was saying I shouldn't try what really came through was more a sense of, "don't overcompensate and try too hard to atone/redeem yourself", if that makes sense. To explain that, I certainly have had a shift in my presence online. The me that I am now is far more empathetic, caring, and invested in others than before--and that's not a bad thing! But, I often force it. I often am forcing myself to be more present, because I have it in my mind "I need to atone, I need to make up for my failure, and to make up for it I need to force myself to always be this wonderful amazing engaged person who spreads that joy and positivity all the time". And that was what I got as being the shouldn't try. I can still be that evolved empathetic self. I can still care, I can still give my love and support, but I shouldn't be forcing it as hard as I am. I should be taking a step back, and measuring it, giving it only as it's needed, and being there only when I need to be there, basically. I should try to sense when I should be somewhere, when I should engage, and only do so when it feels I should. I know I caused great harm, and I have accepted accountability for it as much as I can--but I need to accept the accountability from the perspective of others. I'm not sure how to explain that concept, but I understood it for what it is. I knew what was being said, even if I can't explain it with words. I need to accept my part in it all, this I definitely try to do but largely, it is also similar to the above. It's not accepting my part from my perspective, it's accepting my part from theirs, and that I try to do but I need to get better at it. I need to surrender myself and not try to fight at all. I need to not give the time needed to heal, and not try to improve the situation. I made a mistake and am accountable for it, I have at least a decent idea of what line I crossed, and need to accept I did, and the consequences. I need to accept what I did, continue to work on myself, give up on my anxieties, my worries, my selfish desires, my unrealistic hopes, and forgive myself. To work on healing, to remove the negativity and bad from it, release control, accept things. And just give that love. This is modified from a message I sent to a community member who needed a little bit of love, and I feel it's needed to be sent to all.
I'm not spreading it directly across discords, I made it too long for one message and it doesn't fit neatly within. But I feel like it needs to be said. I wrote it and thought of those I have lost. I somewhat felt like I was writing it to them, despite them likely never wanting to ever see anything me ever again including this message partially to them. I also felt it was to me, because I need to adapt this as a mantra moving forward. But it's mostly for others. For community members. For anyone and everyone to stumble upon my blog and read, or those who actually click on the link when I share this blog. This goes out to you, those who need it. Feel free to keep spreading it, or if you want, keep it for yourself. You can read it as many times as you want. This goes out to those who have dealt with loss, and in this day and age, that's almost everyone. So my message to you is this. Everything is finite, so everything is temporary. Even the internet. When it comes to online spaces, most are going to be in your life only temporarily. Both the spaces and the people within. People can come and go, leaving for either just a while or permanently. Communities can slow down and stop, even shut down, and may or may not ever come back. Whenever people leave, whenever you have to leave, whenever a community shuts down, it's okay to be sad. It's okay to lament the loss of continued times. To miss someone, to miss a community, to reminisce about all the good and wish there was more. But, the loss doesn't invalidate the wonderful times had. They existed, no matter what. They did at least some good, and had some impact which felt positive, for some amount of time. They were real. They existed. They mattered. They were beautiful and wonderful while they lasted. The people were good friends, and maybe more. The communities were wonderful. Maybe the times weren't all good, maybe things weren't all good, maybe things didn't even end well. (Or maybe they did. Or with a whimper. Or any other way.) It need not be all positive to still have had positive having existed, and that positivity MATTERED. And because it mattered, the loss also matters. We can grieve that loss, and that loss is valid. It can induce sadness years down the line, and that's okay. Remorse when reminiscing knows no time limit. The loss of community, the loss of family, the loss of friends, all hurt and will never truly stop hurting. So to be hurt at any time is okay. That pain is real. That pain is valid. That pain is OKAY. What's important to remember above all else is the good times had. Those times were good, and they were real. They mattered. Maybe they ended badly, and it's tempting to view the past through the lens of the bad end, poison the memories, and see things in the worst light, but AT THE TIME, they brought good feelings. Maybe things ended abruptly, but they still were good. Maybe things just ended gradually and slowly from decay, but they were still good. The good times may not continue with that person, people, or community, but they weren't a lie, they weren't nonexistent, they weren't wrong, they weren't something to be ashamed of or to regret having had. They mattered, they helped. They got you to where you are today, and you are mostly better for it. And who you are now has a long ways to go yet, in terms of good experiences. You have the rest of your life to have those good experiences. You can find a new space for good times. You can find new people to have good times with. You have the rest of your life to form memories, positive ones, good ones, which will leave you with a lifetime of smiles to look back at. You will make good memories, in new, beautiful ways. You will form bonds, you will share spaces, and these things will be all the more precious. And this will always apply, until the day you die. You will always be able to find a place, and people, for you, to live fully and happily and with joy and positivity, and to remember down the line. Plus, one of the best beauties of life is its myriad of surprises. Not all are good, with many giving trials to triumph over which strain and often break relationships or even communities. Yet most are, giving you wonderful twists you could never have planned for and wouldn't trade for anything in the world. Among them is reconnecting. And rebuilding. As long as people live, friendships can be rekindled. As long as people live, communities can be rebuilt. As long as you live, things can be restarted. It's never guaranteed, some things are lost forever and can never be retrieved. You shouldn't hold onto what is likely false hope of some magical way to restore a lost link from your earlier life. Yet if you are open to the possibility, you can always leave the bridge open to the potential of it happening if it feels right. Only time will tell what twists you face in life. Yet I truly believe it will be joyous. Life is wonderful, and beautiful, and incredible. Don't be afraid to live it because of pain from the past. You can't stop yourself from feeling that pain, but don't let it control you. Don't let it define you. Let your pain exist, as it's valid, acknowledge it, yet don't let it dictate your choices, your future. Because your future is going to be better than your past, as long as you let it be. And you can do it, even if you don't think you are. Well-wishes. I once again meant this for a single server where I try to carry general chat in messages of encouragement and love, but after I wrote it, I knew I needed to share across the globe.
So for any who need it, this goes to you. I know you might not feel good about yourself and think you’re alone and isolated, everyone else is fine, with thoughts that you must be broken or faulty for not being like them. But they wear a mask, too. And everyone is broken more than you get to see, so you are never alone. You see the good in others and only the flaws in yourself, but they see the inverse, and they can see all which is good about you. You are seen and loved, beautiful and brilliant. The love you have for others is wonderful, and you deserve the happiness of feeling others love you back. No matter your mistakes, no matter what you have done or didn’t do, you are still worthy of being loved. And I hope this can carry you through the middle of the week. As draining as it can be, as exhausting as it is, you have made it this far and you will keep making it further. Go pursue your dreams and happiness, for you have earned them. 💖 ...but not nearly enough time.
My fiance came with me to work today (they felt it was needed and tbh they probably were right) and was tired when we got home so cleaning didn't get done. I had a lot of uplifting things happen and I feel a lot better. I have a ton to be proud of, but a ton not getting done. My bills are likely overdue and still not paid. I'm probably still making the wrong choices--for instance, a couple hours ago I asked myself "do I send (a type of message) to (a person)", but I ultimately felt it'd have been a mistake even with the best wording so opted out, and I'll always wonder/ask myself if that was the correct call and I likely never will know. (In general, I am naturally reactive. I don't show proactivity and proactively reach out, but I always wonder if it's the right thing to do to wait for someone to reach out to me with the appropriate action on my end being doing nothing until they do, or if I should be doing more than I am. AS FAR AS I KNOW, waiting is the better option, but again...I dunno.) Today I was largely more positive, so my exercise in getting a better mental yesterday partially worked--not fully, which is why having my fiance helped a lot, but today was mostly more in the positive realm. I did dwell an uncomfortably long time on hypothetical what-ifs I never want to visit yet instinctively keep around as intrusive thoughts, but instead of dominating for ALL of the day, it was only a small part of the day and I was able to shake them off and get more healthy thoughts going. I did story stuff today, albeit just a bit of notekeeping. Still proud of doing it as it's been weeks maybe months since I last did and I've been wanting to do that for a long while. I'm not going to get everything I want to do done today but that's okay. Any deadlines on things like getting a new streaming software or my discord bots to have reactions for roles to be auto-assigned are purely arbitrary and did not need to strictly be done today. And there's always tomorrow. I wrote some lovely messages and spread them to maybe too many discords. Well, it was only two or three messages with one of them copypasted across almost all of them--I wrote that message for one server, but I ended up feeling it shouldn't be limited to just there. It just felt right to spread it around to share that love, kindness, and affection to others. And maybe, I should also share it on here. I know (other than my fiance reading over my shoulder which to be clear is okay and I am okay with it and it's lovely and I love you so much my love and it's okay and I do mean it) that nobody really reads my blogs outside of maybe when I advertise them or random checkins (I don't have a consistent daily viewerbase despite the blogs themselves being daily--and that's okay, just stating I know it is the case), but in case anyone does do those random checkins and sees this, or in case this blog gets seen when I next advertise it, or in case the blog gets regular viewership, or in case the blog gets someone at some future point deciding to bingeread and they stumble into here or in case someone looks at the tags and spots this, basically in case anyone by any method sees this, it bears repeating for everyone. This is the kind of message I aim to spread to everyone in my life this year, as long as they will let me. (And I know, there are those who won't, and that's okay. That's valid. I will wish them well regardless even if they wish nothing to do with me, but I will respect their boundaries. As long as I know what they are, I will never cross them.) I resolved to spread joy and positivity, and it starts with messages like this. Don’t worry about any setbacks. You are still doing good regardless of them. Don’t worry too much about what you’re not doing. It’s okay. There’s a finite amount of time in any given day. You can’t do everything you want to in any given day. You will always give something up, and you will probably be inclined to lament the loss of that thing, but you have your whole life ahead of you. It’s never too late. You can and should focus on what you believe is the most important thing in your life on the given day, and It’s okay if what that is, changes. You can find a way to balance eventually, no matter how long it takes. 💖 And on top of that, I also wanted to add more. I will always be around to help, as long as I am able to, in any way I can. I will always have my DMs open. I will accept any request. I will do anything for those who I would gladly call my friend. And I call plenty of people friend gladly, including plenty who probably would prefer I not. Regardless, I will be there for a friend, always, in any way they want me to be. I will always show my love. I know there are a bunch of people in pain. The pain is active, the pain is real, the hurt is there. The fallout of past actions had consequences which left longlasting hurt and damage and left so much harm which hasn't healed. And perhaps never will. But while I can't do anything for those who don't want me to do anything, if they do want me to do something I will do whatever I can to help them in any way shape or form. A lot has changed, and things will never be the same. I'm the same I've always been, but I've also changed. (For the better I feel.) And that applies for all people, too. They change. Their perceptions change. Their lives change. They face turmoil. They face pain. But I will do whatever I can to spread words of positivity and affirmations and give them a bit of joy. I will not be perfect, but I will offer the reassurance I can, as I can. I will strive to make everyone's lives be better, including giving them a fresh outlook on things, to build on what they have. And you, my lovely reader, are part of that. I know my words are just words, they probably don't offer as much impact as I would want them to. So this message is temporary, perhaps lasting only seconds, or minutes, maybe if I'm lucky can last you a day. It won't stick, no matter how much I wish it would, but I offer it all the same because so much as a single second better is worth it in the end so take this message with you. You are loved. You have such amazing and wonderful love, compassion, and care to give to others and the world, which you do. You are talented. You have a good sense of humor. You are nerdy. You are worth spending time around, and you are worth being invested in. You are enough as you are. You are good enough. You deserve all the good things you have. You are going to go far in life. You are going to accomplish great things. You have made an impact in life, more than you know, and you make it just by existing. You matter. You are seen. You are loved. And yes, life is not perfect. Not everything will go right. There will be challenges. There will be setbacks. There will be hurdles. But you are remarkably adept at overcoming them, more than you know, and that is beautiful. And if you decide not to, then whatever you pivot to? Just as amazing and wonderful. You are incredible. You can do it. You can get through the trials and tribulations. You make a difference. And you are memorable. I truly hope you can some day accept at least some of these things as true. I know it's hard to show that self-love, but just know I truly believe this of you, and if I believe it of you, then you can eventually too. Much love. It's going to start mostly negative, but I'm hoping that it'll lead to positive. Basically, my hope is to air out my depression and reverse it into positive thoughts because I don't want to carry them into tomorrow--particularly since the plan is for me to go to work alone tomorrow.
My fiance and I have largely become inseparable. And while that can be a good thing in some ways, it can also be a bad thing when we actually have a need to separate for life stuff for a longer duration. And tomorrow is going to be one of those days. My fiance is going to clean tomorrow while I'm at work, and potentially get their test stream done (or at least conclude the troubleshooting). And that means I won't be able to hug them, kiss them, talk to them in person, be reassured by them, grab their hand, etc. On a day where I'm busy enough to not have time to think, that's okay. On a day when I can think and I'm not inspired by a story, I instead think about my past mistakes. And because I've had my mistakes on mind since Saturday and they're not going away despite me knowing how unhealthy they are (I'm trying to get rid of the thoughts, but everything I've tried hasn't kept them at bay), I want to try and air out some thoughts about the negative and hopefully reverse them into a positive I can carry through tomorrow and maybe the rest of the week. I'll start by saying I have detractors. Maybe you think that word is too light, maybe you think that word is too harsh. Maybe you think that word is inaccurate, maybe you think I'm downplaying with that word or maybe you think that word is too aggressive, or maybe you think that word is too much, so substitute it for whatever term you would like to use. I have people who think of me negatively. I have people who carry negative feelings about me. I have people who have negative thoughts about me. I don't know what their exact thoughts are, their exact feelings. For lack of a better term, I have no idea what their gripes with me are unless they tell me directly, and most of the people who have those negative feelings towards me want nothing to do with me including to let me know they have those negative views of me. (And, same thing for 'gripes' as 'detractors'. That word may not be what you think is apt to use. Substitute appropriately, with the adjustments you think are warranted.) I may not know...but I can certainly make guesses. Because my biggest detractor is myself, and when I let my thoughts be fueled by my imposter syndrome, I start to think these negative things are true, that they are the reason I am such a sad pathetic human because they apply. A not-complete, incomplete, partial list? They might think I am a monster. They might think I have done monstrous things. They might think I am a sociopath. They might think I am a psychopath. They might think I am a narcissist. They might think I am selfish. They might think I am uncaring. They might think I am incapable of true friendship. They might think I lack mindfulness. They might think I don't think of others. They might think I'm apathetic. They might think I'm incapable of caring. They might think I'm unable to empathize. They might think I'm unable to form deep meaningful bonds. They might think I am a liar. They might think I am dishonest with myself. They might think I don't respect people. They might think I don't respect boundaries. They might think I can be a borderline stalker. They might think I am obsessed with my image. They might think everything good about me is an act. They might think I am a Manipulator. (And to be fair, I am. I've played Mafia for nearly 18 years continuously, since I was 13 years old, and that deeply damaged me, because I can't not do it, even instinctively. All I can really do is harvest the Manipulation and try to do good with it, rather than selfishly using it for evil.) They might think I am deranged. They might think I am delusional. They might think I make excuses for justifying bad behavior. They might think I don't care. They might think I am a pile of vitriol, filled with negative emotions. They might think I don't understand. (And to be fair, I may not. If something isn't explained to me, I can only guess, and I probably guess wrong.) They might think I'm incapable of doing good. They might think I keep doing nothing but harm. They might think I shouldn't be around them or their spaces at all. They might think I am needy. They might think I am greedy. They might think I am bitter. They might think I am petty. They might think I am meanspirited. They might think I lovebomb people, out of a need to be loved. They might think I condone terrible acts. They might think I condone terrible people. They might think I am remorseless. They might think I have no regrets. They might think I'm all talk and have no actions to back it. They might think I'm incapable of seeing my wrongdoing and knowing I was or am in the wrong. For now, that's all I can really think of off the top of my head, but I'm sure if I focused on it, I could think of more. I'm sure none of my detractors think literally all of these, but all of my detractors think at least some of these, and probably more. (Like I said, it's guesswork.) I want to reiterate they are valid for thinking so. They are right to believe that of me. Their thoughts and feelings towards me are not wrong. They are right, at least to them. They are valid. They are right to believe that. They have good reasons to, and regardless of whether those things are true, they are still not in the wrong for thinking and acting on those beliefs/feelings. Yet at the same time... ...I do not have to believe them of myself. I am not me at my worst. Maybe at my worst, my imposter syndrome is at least partially right that I am those things at least in part. Maybe. But I am not me at my worst. I do care. Arguably too much. I can't stop caring. By God, it would be so much easier if I COULD stop caring, but I clearly can't. I do know I have done wrong. I constantly wonder/worry if I'm still doing wrong, but try my best to not. (Obviously, I could still be doing wrong, but I try my best on my own to not do wrong, and I really need others to help me there because I can only be so accurate in my judgements, I'm bound to have gotten things wrong without knowing despite trying.) I do try my best to do the right thing. I love people, perhaps too much. (God, if I didn't love the people I've hurt then it wouldn't hurt so much to know I hurt them.) I'm not a monster. I'm selfless to an unhealthy degree. I'm a people pleaser to the point where being selfish is something I almost am completely incapable of. I befriend everyone I spend time about, and care about them. I learn about them, I try to help them. I uplift people, or at least attempt to. I remember things about them. I try to follow boundaries and show everyone the care and respect they deserve. I have people who are ride-or-die friends, who I would do anything for. I am honest to a fault, sharing thoughts I maybe shouldn't. My view of myself is so negative it is debilitating and crippling, not the inverse. The good things about me aren't an act. They are my default self. They are who I am. They are the true me. I am who I am, and who I am is someone who has always cared, always loved, always tried her best, always aimed to help. I am almost free of negative emotions. I have self-loathing and sadness, but direct no negative emotions to anyone else. I am trying my best, always, to do the right thing. I am trying my best to pursue the path of greatest good, and to make the best possible difference in the world. I know I have done wrong. I will carry the regrets from my wrongdoing for the rest of my life. I will spend the rest of my life trying to atone, and have learned from my mistakes. I try to avoid making new mistakes, and am applying things to try and make the most positive impact I can in the world. I am determined to let people know how wonderful and beautiful and talented they are, and to help uplift them and elevate them, even at the expense of myself. I put others before myself, prioritizing their needs/wellbeing over my own. Every day, I live to try and show it with every action I make. Maybe I am being too kind to myself in the rebuttal of those thoughts about myself. Maybe I am some of the things I try not to be. But maybe the imposter syndrome is being too harsh to myself. Maybe, just maybe, no matter how valid the complaints, no matter how valid the criticisms, I'm not defined by my worst self, I'm not defined by my mistakes, they aren't who I am, and I am instead defined by what I do and what I am most of the time. Maybe, just maybe, I am a good person, who--despite my flaws, despite being imperfect, despite my mistakes--does good and who makes a positive impact in the world. I need to remember that and believe it. I am trying my best. I am certainly continuing to make mistakes, no doubt about it. (Heck if I know what those mistakes are, if I did I wouldn't have made them, would I?) But I am still trying my best, and doing good. I know those who are my detractors will likely never truly forgive me. They might say they will, but they never truly will. And that's okay. That's valid. If I'm not worthy of forgiveness to them, then I am not worthy. If they can't forgive me, then they can't forgive me. If they think I don't deserve forgiveness, then they shouldn't be forced to. If they think I deserve to be punished, then they can pursue attempting to get me punished. That is valid. That is their right. That is their perspective, and their perspective is valid. Their thoughts are to be validated and respected. Their feelings deserve acknowledgement and to be honored. But, I need to forgive myself. I need to be enough as I am. So let's pursue being enough as I am. Still pursuing being better than I am right now! But, still being good enough with me trying my best. I hope that mindset is one I can spread to others, and to help build others up as well. Including any brave readers to read this start to finish. Love you all. I'll do my best, and you will too. |
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