So I thought I'd share with you my schedule in a typical average week, to give you a general idea of the sort of stuff that happens to me. Might as well start the week on Monday, with today as an example. I wake up at 7, extremely groggy and tired, both not having much sleep thanks to a late bedtime (those quick errands? Yeeeeeah, not so quick) and thanks to not sleeping well at all (I woke up several times because I couldn't tell the difference between a lucid dream and reality, sometimes thinking that I was in a dream when it was reality and often vice-vera, with just the first being a panic attack that it was actually Monday afternoon and I had slept until 4:30 PM with it dark out already, rather than it being 4:30 AM as it was).
I take a shower, but because I'm a beauty queen (really, it's mainly to compose my thoughts for the entire day, let the events of the night flow over me, let my creative juices begin to flow, and generally, recharge my body), it takes a minimum of one hour and can take up to an hour and a half. (Today was an hour and fifteen minutes.) Then comes breakfast: three overeasy eggs, yolks still in-tact, which I eat along side two pieces of buttered toast and a cup of coffee with creamer.
Frequently, I don't finish the toast, though, saving it for an afternoon snack. Instead, I take a nap until 9, at which point, I leave for the college. If I have homework due, then I work on it; if not, I'll spend my time on leisurely activities, because my class doesn't meet on Mondays in spite of Mondays technically being a class day. (My parents, of course, are unaware of this fact, but I like coming to the school on Mondays. Helps me.)
At around 11, I head back to where I was dropped off, to be picked up by my dad. Then, when I get home, it's shortly before noon, giving me two hours of free time. Now, on days like today, I spent it on leisurely time, but I'm progressively convinced that timeframe is best spent napping, because I leave for work at 2.
Then, I work from 3-8. (On that note, it was INCREDIBLY busy tonight. Really, really annoyingly so, in fact.) At which time I come home. Now right now, that leaves me about an hour of safe leisurely time before Castle (which I'm spending typing this up), though I know this'll change once Dancing with the Stars begins. After Castle ends at 11 PM, I have from then until whenever I decide to go to bed (usually later given the lack of work on Tuesdays), but it's typically an average of 1:30-3:00, though it can go as early as 12:30 to as late as 4:30.
On Tuesdays, I get an extra hour of sleep because of no shower, and eat slowly for approximately half an hour. (I can take up to an hour to eat, because my eating takes the place of a shower in that it serves to ready my thoughts for the day, but when doing so, I get no nap! So I typically make sure I've eaten fast enough to have half an hour of naptime to spare.) Otherwise, the routine is the same: leave at 9, class 'til 11, get home at noon, and there, I have about 4.5 hours of leisurely time available before I leave for Tae Kwon Do.
Tuesday nights are of course busy, with FaceOff (great new season!), Agents of SHIELD, and Forever, so I generally don't get further leisurely time until 1, given that I also watch the program dividing up showings of FaceOff (original and repeat, 9 then 11, with the program being 10 and midnight). I usually am smart enough not to spend too much leisurely time and use it for sleep, but all the same, I do spend some amount of time always, generally an hour or two, placing bedtime at anywhere from 1:30 to 3:00.
Wednesdays start the same way as Mondays, but I go basically straight from home (aside from a brief nap, no more than 15 minutes) to work, leaving at exactly noon (because I typically get home a little bit before, you see) and getting home at around 4:30 or so. This gives me 75 or so minutes of leisurely time before I leave for square dancing, which takes me until about 9:45 or so to get home from. And from there, it is leisurely activities throughout the whole night. (Wednesdays are one of the main free nights, in fact.) So again, generally an average of 1:45 AM or so bedtime, though given a lack of activities on Thursday, generally later. (3:30 is alarmingly common.)
Thursdays are the same as Tuesday pretty much, but if I have round dancing, then I leave at 6:30 rather than 4:30, at the cost of not getting home until typically 10:30 (as opposed to 8 for TKD). But from 10:30 until I go to bed, I have leisurely time. However, given the lack of activities at all, I abuse Thursday nights quite a lot; most of my work gets done these nights.
Fridays are 50/50 on shower/not shower, but fortunately, there's no time limit on when I'm woken up--generally, though, I get woken up at between 11 AM and 1 PM. Given that Fridays are family night, that gives me until 6:30-7:30 (depending on sibling arrival times) for leisurely activities, and I barely do anything after those 4.5-8 hours of free time have been used up. (Unless I got hooked on TVTropes, in which case I may spend additional leisurely time browsing, anywhere from 3-5 AM.)
Saturdays are like Fridays, except movie night begins between 4 and 5, meaning only 3 free hours, excluding breakfast. I do have a small 1.5 hour window between movie night and anime beginning, though. Anime has been ending at 3 AM so far.
And Sundays are the nightmare. I get up at 6 AM, because I need to leave at 7. I eat half my breakfast, because I need the nap to function at all. I work until I get home at 1:30, and then leave straight to round dancing. That lasts until 5, but it's straight from there to square dancing, lasting until 9, and taking until about 10:30 to get home. Knowing that I've got work the next day, I do try to limit my leisurely activities, but if you didn't noticed, I'm...a bit compulsive with them; they're obsessions.
I'm sure there's little things here and there I didn't mention, but that gives you a basic window into my life. I have plenty of free time. I don't use it effectively. In fact, right now, I kinda...feel like my life's falling apart. I'm tired and exhausted constantly. (That I probably am averaging 4.5 hours a night if that much probably doesn't help.) Today, I missed out on the majority of my homework: I BSed my way through a quiz (albeit quite well, getting 80/90, meaning only 5 questions wrong of 45), did 2/6 of the basic assignments, and completely neglected to do the big assignment. In other words, 80+32 or so out of 390 for last week's homework. Yes, 390. The big assignment was worth 200 points. The weekly assignments are worth 100. I got zero on the former, and only a fraction on the latter.
All because I feel like I'm failing my efforts to get my life under control. I kinda...feel like I may be snapping. Cracking. Breaking. There's a burden on me, pressure, and I'm feeling it. It's so...heavy. I'm always so...so tired. I lack the willpower to fight, too. I'm...well, messed up. You see how much free time I have. You'd put it to good use.
I spend it playing games.
For someone desiring control, I sure don't feel like I'm having any. I'm wasting my life. And I know it.
I take a shower, but because I'm a beauty queen (really, it's mainly to compose my thoughts for the entire day, let the events of the night flow over me, let my creative juices begin to flow, and generally, recharge my body), it takes a minimum of one hour and can take up to an hour and a half. (Today was an hour and fifteen minutes.) Then comes breakfast: three overeasy eggs, yolks still in-tact, which I eat along side two pieces of buttered toast and a cup of coffee with creamer.
Frequently, I don't finish the toast, though, saving it for an afternoon snack. Instead, I take a nap until 9, at which point, I leave for the college. If I have homework due, then I work on it; if not, I'll spend my time on leisurely activities, because my class doesn't meet on Mondays in spite of Mondays technically being a class day. (My parents, of course, are unaware of this fact, but I like coming to the school on Mondays. Helps me.)
At around 11, I head back to where I was dropped off, to be picked up by my dad. Then, when I get home, it's shortly before noon, giving me two hours of free time. Now, on days like today, I spent it on leisurely time, but I'm progressively convinced that timeframe is best spent napping, because I leave for work at 2.
Then, I work from 3-8. (On that note, it was INCREDIBLY busy tonight. Really, really annoyingly so, in fact.) At which time I come home. Now right now, that leaves me about an hour of safe leisurely time before Castle (which I'm spending typing this up), though I know this'll change once Dancing with the Stars begins. After Castle ends at 11 PM, I have from then until whenever I decide to go to bed (usually later given the lack of work on Tuesdays), but it's typically an average of 1:30-3:00, though it can go as early as 12:30 to as late as 4:30.
On Tuesdays, I get an extra hour of sleep because of no shower, and eat slowly for approximately half an hour. (I can take up to an hour to eat, because my eating takes the place of a shower in that it serves to ready my thoughts for the day, but when doing so, I get no nap! So I typically make sure I've eaten fast enough to have half an hour of naptime to spare.) Otherwise, the routine is the same: leave at 9, class 'til 11, get home at noon, and there, I have about 4.5 hours of leisurely time available before I leave for Tae Kwon Do.
Tuesday nights are of course busy, with FaceOff (great new season!), Agents of SHIELD, and Forever, so I generally don't get further leisurely time until 1, given that I also watch the program dividing up showings of FaceOff (original and repeat, 9 then 11, with the program being 10 and midnight). I usually am smart enough not to spend too much leisurely time and use it for sleep, but all the same, I do spend some amount of time always, generally an hour or two, placing bedtime at anywhere from 1:30 to 3:00.
Wednesdays start the same way as Mondays, but I go basically straight from home (aside from a brief nap, no more than 15 minutes) to work, leaving at exactly noon (because I typically get home a little bit before, you see) and getting home at around 4:30 or so. This gives me 75 or so minutes of leisurely time before I leave for square dancing, which takes me until about 9:45 or so to get home from. And from there, it is leisurely activities throughout the whole night. (Wednesdays are one of the main free nights, in fact.) So again, generally an average of 1:45 AM or so bedtime, though given a lack of activities on Thursday, generally later. (3:30 is alarmingly common.)
Thursdays are the same as Tuesday pretty much, but if I have round dancing, then I leave at 6:30 rather than 4:30, at the cost of not getting home until typically 10:30 (as opposed to 8 for TKD). But from 10:30 until I go to bed, I have leisurely time. However, given the lack of activities at all, I abuse Thursday nights quite a lot; most of my work gets done these nights.
Fridays are 50/50 on shower/not shower, but fortunately, there's no time limit on when I'm woken up--generally, though, I get woken up at between 11 AM and 1 PM. Given that Fridays are family night, that gives me until 6:30-7:30 (depending on sibling arrival times) for leisurely activities, and I barely do anything after those 4.5-8 hours of free time have been used up. (Unless I got hooked on TVTropes, in which case I may spend additional leisurely time browsing, anywhere from 3-5 AM.)
Saturdays are like Fridays, except movie night begins between 4 and 5, meaning only 3 free hours, excluding breakfast. I do have a small 1.5 hour window between movie night and anime beginning, though. Anime has been ending at 3 AM so far.
And Sundays are the nightmare. I get up at 6 AM, because I need to leave at 7. I eat half my breakfast, because I need the nap to function at all. I work until I get home at 1:30, and then leave straight to round dancing. That lasts until 5, but it's straight from there to square dancing, lasting until 9, and taking until about 10:30 to get home. Knowing that I've got work the next day, I do try to limit my leisurely activities, but if you didn't noticed, I'm...a bit compulsive with them; they're obsessions.
I'm sure there's little things here and there I didn't mention, but that gives you a basic window into my life. I have plenty of free time. I don't use it effectively. In fact, right now, I kinda...feel like my life's falling apart. I'm tired and exhausted constantly. (That I probably am averaging 4.5 hours a night if that much probably doesn't help.) Today, I missed out on the majority of my homework: I BSed my way through a quiz (albeit quite well, getting 80/90, meaning only 5 questions wrong of 45), did 2/6 of the basic assignments, and completely neglected to do the big assignment. In other words, 80+32 or so out of 390 for last week's homework. Yes, 390. The big assignment was worth 200 points. The weekly assignments are worth 100. I got zero on the former, and only a fraction on the latter.
All because I feel like I'm failing my efforts to get my life under control. I kinda...feel like I may be snapping. Cracking. Breaking. There's a burden on me, pressure, and I'm feeling it. It's so...heavy. I'm always so...so tired. I lack the willpower to fight, too. I'm...well, messed up. You see how much free time I have. You'd put it to good use.
I spend it playing games.
For someone desiring control, I sure don't feel like I'm having any. I'm wasting my life. And I know it.
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