I'm going to bed but I need to bloggggggggg.

It was a wasted trip.

I had a fever this morning.
I am sure that unless I am magically on the road to recovery (which I don't feel like I am), I will have a fever later today and tonight.
But at the only time I could visit the doctor.
I didn't have the main symptom I've been suffering from for almost four weeks now.

They took my temperature, and it was normal. They listened to me describe what I've had, and summed it up more or less as, "So, you haven't taken your temperature, and have just felt it?"

It was in that moment I realized they didn't believe me at all. And were only not saying as much because of a sense of professionalism in being obliged to humor me. Because I don't have any other symptoms. I don't cough frequently enough to be considered a cough; I've had a brief sore throat for part of the day, once or twice per week so like about 3-5 times total but it went away in less than a day so I don't have that, either.

And no real diarrhea, beyond what is normal for me anyway. In that sure not everything coming out all the time comes out in neat stools, but that happens to everyone every once and a while and it's not consistent; on average, I simply haven't had diarrhea so no symptom there, either.

And while I've had times where I felt like I couldn't eat more unless I'd place myself at risk of vomiting. I haven't felt like I would vomit, specifically because I've taken steps to avoid feeling that way, so I don't have that symptom. No cough. No sore throat. No diarrhea. No vomiting.

Just the fever, which I have no readings for, and which wasn't there at the actual time of the appointment in spite of just how debilitating it has been when it has shown up. And the exhaustion associated with sapped stamina from sickness.

They took bloodwork, which will take a couple days to get results back from.
They told me it wasn't bacterial, which I already knew.
But since there was no proof of it at the time I went in.
And I could offer them no proof of it.

Even if they didn't say it to my face.
They just didn't believe I had it altogether.

So, wasted trip. In spite of it having been almost four weeks. Advice was just give it more time, that if it's actually real it should clear up on its own.

First I work, but after that.

​Hopefully I'll finally get some direction.

I am an idiot.
I had a chance to go to bed earlier.
I did not take it.
In fact it's actually a little past my bedtime; I'm only up because I almost forgot to blog again.

I tried to get better.
I really, really tried.
I tried sleeping in, I took a nice soothing, relaxing bath in my shower, had orange juice, the whole works.
All the prep in the world.

Still sick.
Still with the same fever.
And soreness in neck.
And utter lack of stamina, creating general fatigue.
I am exhausted, and I am not getting better.

I'm not getting worse, sure.
But it's been three and a half weeks now, and I'm still not better.

I've also lost weight, too.

The earliest I can see a doctor is on Friday.
But I do intend to, if this keeps up.

I imagine they'll be useless. If they prescribe antibiotics, I won't take them because I know this isn't a bacterial infection. Everything about it screams "virus". And they can't really do much for most viruses I imagine. But all the same, I'll go just in case they can tell me what the heck's going on because I'm just...this is something which hasn't happened to me ever before.

I've been sick this long, sure, but never with a continuous fever and literally no other symptoms at all.
In fact, the lack of symptoms is proof this is a bad sickness.
My family has what I call the "daily sneezes". Where once a day, at random, we will sneeze a few times, and then get an incredibly runny nose after. Not related to food or environment or time; any time of the day in any location regardless of diet. (I was pointed at one point to a genetic condition which matched these symptoms, so it's possible we have that.) And yet during this sickness, haven't had them as far as I can recall.

The signs others see as being sickness which I normally have even when not sick...aren't present at all.

And nothing about it has changed.

So I need to get it sorted out.

My girlfriend commands it.

I REALLY THOUGHT I DID THO

So I'm not doing anything today.

Which is fine, since I'm still sick.

I'm still sickkkkkkkkk

But I need to blog so here's me blogging.