All Too Human
All Too Human
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Rambles, Rants, and Musings

I need to stop doing some bad habits.

9/20/2017

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Chiefly among them? Writing right before I go to bed and then writing about almost nothing as a consequence. But I do have a long day tomorrow. I need to take a shower (for dance), do morning stuff, leave for work, get ready for dance, and so on and so forth. It's going to start early and go late. So this is about as much as I can manage now. Apologies!
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Bleh I wanted to talk about today.

9/19/2017

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Mostly thanks to my adventures. But now I'm so tired that all I want to do is sleep. Oh well. Tomorrow maybe.
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I RAN OUTTA TIME

9/18/2017

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So I didn't have time to post a blog even though I wrote this as a blog entry. Right. Yeah.
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Today wasn't the best of days.

9/17/2017

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So I'm not gonna say much.
I spent time mostly unwinding today, soooo no blog. Not really.
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Well my parents are home.

9/16/2017

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...So I'm going to be rather busy in the next couple of days. I'll be doing a little bit of this and a little bit of that. Lots of stuff essentially. I don't have a coherent agenda and I can't coherently say things here but, well. Work tomorrow means me not having much time so gonna make an entry and take care of stuff and go to bed.
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Well we had family night.

9/15/2017

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As much as you can when your parents are out of state. (They're coming home tomorrow, but that's a good thing, since I imagine they can't mess with my plans for tomorrow. Or, well, later today.) Which in this case...was us three siblings only. Our limited palette consisted of pancakes, pancakes, and...pancakes, because that's literally all we had left which was dinner-meal-worthy.

We marathoned through the rest of Bungo Stray Dogs, at the very least, and tried browsing to find any other anime worth watching. My brother asked me if my TVTropes browsing ever brings me to good anime to watch. The answer is both a yes and a no, in that it brings me to anime I would watch, and yet I am reasonably certain they would not.

...Mainly because my standards for anime are much, much, much, much lower and you could probably put absolute garbage-tier anime on and I'd find a way to tolerate it. I'm good at finding the better aspects of shows, most of the time. Plus, even if I weren't, I figure that if someone wants to show me sometime then I can at least make comments while watching it with them. (Win-win.) Something we don't really do when we watch things as a family, sooooo...again. Nothing THEY would watch even if I would.

Ah well.

I think that's about everything to say, so I should be getting to bed soon.
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Well this isn't good.

9/14/2017

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My parents have been gone for well over a week at this point. Now there are some things that we kids (by which I mean, mostly my sister) can handle in the house on our own. But we can't handle everything. Or at least, we really really really don't want to.

But right now it's increasingly looking like we might be forced to.
I ran out of my fiber supplement as of tonight. I may be able to locate a replacement if we have some in the house. Even if not, while perhaps not as rich of a source I can find ways to get fiber in my diet. (In fact I already have done so by largely switching to a cereal-based diet.)

...But we're also low on other essentials. Orange juice. Milk, down to our last container. Bread. And so on and so forth. Things which might require...gasp...SHOPPING in order to fix. Us. Kids. Shopping. Or doing the lazy bachelor route and learning to live without these things by simply adapting to go without.

In that regard, not having parents around kinda sucks.

​But oh well, we'll manage.
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Well I had an entry idea...

9/13/2017

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...But then I forgot. WELP. Oh well. I guess I'll have to do a nothingness blog for the day. Ah well. What can you do. It is what it is.
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My finger feels thoroughly naked.

9/12/2017

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Last night I lost my ring. I know the exact area it fell off in, I just can't find it. Funnily enough, this is the second ring I've lost to the folds of my computer area. WELP.
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Well I am thoroughly depressed.

9/11/2017

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This isn't anyone's fault. Nothing recent triggered it. I don't think it was even the death of my grandfather. Rather, it was just me not noticing until today and putting the pieces together. Basically, several signs and symptoms were there. I've had a lowered appetite. It's gotten to the point where when I get up I don't feel like I can eat--it takes a couple of hours before I feel like I can stomach food. And this is a couple of hours after I actually am in fact out of bed.

Because when I say "get up", I mean "get out of bed", not "wake up". I'm waking up, then going back to sleep. To some extent, this can be attributed to me wanting to retreat inside the dreams. (Inside the dreams, the closest I had to drama was a farmboy/farmgirl protagonist that could talk to animals ranting at a Cruella DeVille lookalike that was part of a corporate conglomerate who had accidentally slain a couple of animals during a tour and was rather callous about it.)

I just. Have felt a desire to retreat within the dream world and not face the reality, not face the world and wake up. I've been sleepy easily no matter how much rest I've gotten. I've slept for hours more than I should, then extra hours. I've been feeling incredibly lonely, needy, and yet also a mess. A bunch of stuff jumbled together. Basically I'm not exactly in a good condition.

And it took me until today to realize, but this has to have been going on for quite a while.

You win some, you lose some.
And this is one I am most definitely losing.
​Not much I can do other than weather the storm.
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    rBree2

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