All Too Human
All Too Human
  • Blog
  • Red Hood Rider

Rambles, Rants, and Musings

Decisions, decisions...

7/16/2016

0 Comments

 
At this point, nothing's really happened today. I don't think anything will, either. But...I suppose there's something I am considering.

On each half of my personality, I've taken or announced intention to take a break from playing mafia.

I'm strongly considering making that apply to both at the same time, for the first time in five, six years. (I last had an entire break back in 2010. Ever since then, I've always, always been involved, somewhere.) This would not be a permanent thing. But I think I want it. Not as "moving on in my life, without mafia".

That won't happen.
Ever.

I'd rather die than let go of it.

And I intend to be around the site every day, as both names.
I just...want to have a little bit of time to refocus. Gather up all of my energy, so to speak. Tackle things I've put off doing, and compose myself. Get it together, take time to rest, and when I've finished doing everything, when there's nothing left for me to do...returning, maybe under both names rather than just one at a time.

This is a fairly important decision to make. It'd also largely affect the direction of the blog. Most of my blog posts have recently been on the subject. But if I spend my time elsewhere, then...I have the ability to get somewhere in my life, I feel like, and that when I come back, it will be with precision and focus and be the best of everything that I hoped to be but currently am not.

Helping this, I have marked my availability at work as only on Sundays. This...is quite obviously, a big fat lie. I'm doing nothing, far more often than doing something. But...I feel like in doing less at work, I will actually be allowed to live more of life.

So basically...I'm very largely considering where to focus my energy in life. It's everywhere. For such a small blog post (I feel like I should be writing more on this), it carries a large weight. It affects ComicFury. It affects everything. This is a point in my life, this summer, where I feel like I'm making a decision for where I want to spend my life.

Ironically, I don't think I'd be able to have come to this point without reaching a simultaneous peak in high, and low. Low: no ComicFury for half a year or so. Increasing distance between me and mafia games, the one place I held some level of solitude. Lots of depression weighing me down. High: so many things in my life progressing further, with me doing things I didn't think I could do.

But because I've been through that, even if this blog hasn't shown it...I feel as if I'm really, really growing up right now, and living at the absolute peak turning point in my life. So, even though I'm about to turn a simple 23, I feel like...I'm about to go somewhere that may make me feel significantly older, in a very good way.
0 Comments



Leave a Reply.

    rBree2

    AKA:
    RangerBree2
    ​rangerbreenew

    Just your average blogger. A transwoman lesbian, with autism, adhd, anxiety, and bipolar disorder, who is plural (a polyfrag median system).

    Twitter
    Twitch
    ​​YouTube
    ​TikTok
    Alt-Blog
    ​Fanhouse​
    Facebook
    Steam

    Archives

    March 2023
    February 2023
    January 2023
    December 2022
    November 2022
    October 2022
    September 2022
    August 2022
    July 2022
    June 2022
    May 2022
    April 2022
    March 2022
    February 2022
    January 2022
    December 2021
    November 2021
    October 2021
    September 2021
    August 2021
    July 2021
    June 2021
    May 2021
    April 2021
    March 2021
    February 2021
    January 2021
    December 2020
    August 2020
    June 2020
    May 2020
    April 2020
    March 2020
    February 2020
    January 2020
    December 2019
    November 2019
    October 2019
    September 2019
    August 2019
    July 2019
    June 2019
    May 2019
    April 2019
    March 2019
    February 2019
    January 2019
    December 2018
    November 2018
    October 2018
    September 2018
    August 2018
    July 2018
    June 2018
    May 2018
    April 2018
    March 2018
    February 2018
    January 2018
    December 2017
    November 2017
    October 2017
    September 2017
    August 2017
    July 2017
    June 2017
    May 2017
    April 2017
    March 2017
    February 2017
    January 2017
    December 2016
    November 2016
    October 2016
    September 2016
    August 2016
    July 2016
    June 2016
    May 2016
    April 2016
    March 2016
    February 2016
    January 2016
    December 2015
    November 2015
    October 2015
    September 2015
    August 2015
    July 2015
    June 2015
    May 2015
    April 2015
    March 2015
    February 2015
    January 2015
    December 2014
    November 2014
    October 2014

    Categories

    All
    Adhd
    Anxiety
    Art
    Autism
    Consumed Entertainment
    Content Creation
    Dancing
    Depression
    Dream
    Family Night
    Farn
    Food
    Games
    Gender Dysphoria
    Health
    Love
    Mafia
    Misophonia
    Past Midnight
    Pets
    Philosophy
    Phyrra And Cyrus
    Plural
    Ramble
    Red Hood Rider
    Religion
    Rider
    Rubyverse
    Saturdays
    School
    Sleep
    Song
    Story
    Sundays
    Tae Kwon Do
    Technical Difficulties
    The Descended
    Trans
    Work

    RSS Feed

Powered by Create your own unique website with customizable templates.