So today my thoughts largely went on and on about my personal beliefs. As in, beliefs, beliefs. As in, I basically covered in my head what is my own personal religion. (As a bit of a half-joke, half-dead-serious name, I call it Meism. As in, Me-ism. Also a pun on deism.) It was basically in a book format, but the book's format was a weird hybrid of formats.
It was part religious text (duh), complete with allegory and storytelling. (Lots of storytelling, actually.) It was part history book. It was part scientific thesis. It was part philosophy paper. Plenty of stuff like that, weirdly blended together to present a fairly coherent, flexible, ever-evolving belief system, covering everything from politics to pursuits in life.
Very good thing to think about, could never actually make real as I am now. It'd basically require a second person to pull off. My mind's not coherent enough to pull all these pieces together, not to mention, remember all this stuff, research all the right things, basically, I've made these little mental comments drawing from every form of media (religion, real life, and philosophy included) that tie a bunch of things together...yet I lack the more "logical", reasonable, coherent half to translate these things to others. And for that matter, to myself.
Since said second person would need all the knowledge I have, and the only person who has that knowledge is me, basically impossible for me to write the book. I've forgotten, then rewritten, a lot of these things. Some stay constant, be it never leaving or simply being reinvented identical to how they were without me being aware I was reinventing identically. Others change. The bits are scattered everywhere. Gathering them together is literally impossible, especially given how half the places they are cannot be found by searching, and/or have since been deleted/lost forever.
In short: I'm the only person who COULD write the text, yet I don't have the mental capacity to write the text. It's not a story. (Well, it'd be written kind-of like a story, but it wouldn't be one.) How can you translate concepts that may not even have words succinctly onto a page in a manner that flows well and makes sense, which can be tied to these other related things, slowly building up?
What would the priority in the ordering be? Where do you start? Where do you end? How much repetition do you allow? Writing down my beliefs, my personal religion which is unique to me (because it draws from all sorts of sources), would, quite literally, be writing The Bible from scratch.
I'd have to track down all these texts that would be referenced in this 'bible', I would have to pick and choose what to put in, I would have to sacrifice absolute clarity for the sake of brevity. It would be tying together hundreds of different concepts and ideas, with a bit of my own fiction thrown in (the story told), weaving together a narrative that is, simply put, too daunting for me.
How many people did it take to write The Bible? Certainly wasn't just one person, in a short amount of time. It was dozens of people, and I think over dozens of years. Heck, the closest thing to a person writing their own Bible would be J.R.R. Tolkien, and even that was a lifetime's work which was--while certainly taking a GREAT many inspirations--largely from only a few specific places.
So that's why short of some miracle in translating my thoughts into text, it's never getting written. I simply don't have the skills, and never will. Even if I could gain them, there'd be the amount of commitment it'd take; I'd certainly not be willing to pour my heart and soul into it.
While making something that appeals only to me is something I'm no stranger to (that's the entire allure of Red Hood Rider, duh), there reaches a certain point where things cross from being a passionate project to an unfortunate chore. I know Red Hood Rider will never get that way, but I can feel it in my bones, if I attempted this bible, it WOULD be that way. My intuition for my capabilities in this regard is usually pretty accurate.
Soyeah...sadly, my beliefs no matter how interesting and fascinating and maybe even groundbreaking they may be will most likely die with me.
It was part religious text (duh), complete with allegory and storytelling. (Lots of storytelling, actually.) It was part history book. It was part scientific thesis. It was part philosophy paper. Plenty of stuff like that, weirdly blended together to present a fairly coherent, flexible, ever-evolving belief system, covering everything from politics to pursuits in life.
Very good thing to think about, could never actually make real as I am now. It'd basically require a second person to pull off. My mind's not coherent enough to pull all these pieces together, not to mention, remember all this stuff, research all the right things, basically, I've made these little mental comments drawing from every form of media (religion, real life, and philosophy included) that tie a bunch of things together...yet I lack the more "logical", reasonable, coherent half to translate these things to others. And for that matter, to myself.
Since said second person would need all the knowledge I have, and the only person who has that knowledge is me, basically impossible for me to write the book. I've forgotten, then rewritten, a lot of these things. Some stay constant, be it never leaving or simply being reinvented identical to how they were without me being aware I was reinventing identically. Others change. The bits are scattered everywhere. Gathering them together is literally impossible, especially given how half the places they are cannot be found by searching, and/or have since been deleted/lost forever.
In short: I'm the only person who COULD write the text, yet I don't have the mental capacity to write the text. It's not a story. (Well, it'd be written kind-of like a story, but it wouldn't be one.) How can you translate concepts that may not even have words succinctly onto a page in a manner that flows well and makes sense, which can be tied to these other related things, slowly building up?
What would the priority in the ordering be? Where do you start? Where do you end? How much repetition do you allow? Writing down my beliefs, my personal religion which is unique to me (because it draws from all sorts of sources), would, quite literally, be writing The Bible from scratch.
I'd have to track down all these texts that would be referenced in this 'bible', I would have to pick and choose what to put in, I would have to sacrifice absolute clarity for the sake of brevity. It would be tying together hundreds of different concepts and ideas, with a bit of my own fiction thrown in (the story told), weaving together a narrative that is, simply put, too daunting for me.
How many people did it take to write The Bible? Certainly wasn't just one person, in a short amount of time. It was dozens of people, and I think over dozens of years. Heck, the closest thing to a person writing their own Bible would be J.R.R. Tolkien, and even that was a lifetime's work which was--while certainly taking a GREAT many inspirations--largely from only a few specific places.
So that's why short of some miracle in translating my thoughts into text, it's never getting written. I simply don't have the skills, and never will. Even if I could gain them, there'd be the amount of commitment it'd take; I'd certainly not be willing to pour my heart and soul into it.
While making something that appeals only to me is something I'm no stranger to (that's the entire allure of Red Hood Rider, duh), there reaches a certain point where things cross from being a passionate project to an unfortunate chore. I know Red Hood Rider will never get that way, but I can feel it in my bones, if I attempted this bible, it WOULD be that way. My intuition for my capabilities in this regard is usually pretty accurate.
Soyeah...sadly, my beliefs no matter how interesting and fascinating and maybe even groundbreaking they may be will most likely die with me.
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