All Too Human
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Rambles, Rants, and Musings

Well I have a kitteh napping on my lap.

9/1/2022

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I was trying to go to bed before 6 am, but...I'm not going to disturb her. <3

I guess that gives me some time for a better entry.

I watched the LCK DRX vs. KT matchup. I loved every minute of it.

I balanced that with the LCO. To be honest, the charm normally found in the LCO felt absent today so it was a secondary focus.

I ended up catching the last game of EDG vs RNG, too.

But mostly I didn't stream tonight because I thought I'd be going to bed at 1 am.

Why?

Because I was dead tired today again.

Yesterday, for whatever reason, I felt like I had gotten so little sleep somehow that I was potentially hallucinating. On the drive home from work on Wednesday, I legit felt like I was seeing things that weren't there. And I almost fell asleep who knows how many times behind the wheel. It was scary. It was dangerous. I was just. that. tired. Randomly. I don't know why. I slept over six hours and they didn't feel restless, but I was clearly exhausted somehow so I don't know what was going on there.

It was bad tho. Really bad.

And today, I slept extra long. I know that sleeping extra long doesn't make up for deficits in sleep, so I can't expect to balance the scales from too little sleep with extra sleep. But since I wasn't getting too little sleep, the hope from sleeping extra long was that I would end up actually fixing whatever went wrong yesterday to make me genuinely think I was hallucinating. (Could it have been tricks of the eye at night? Yes. But I swear I was seeing things that weren't there, and that terrified me.)

It probably would've worked.
I feel better today than I did yesterday...

...But it didn't work out because my family had situation after situation after situation happen. I'm pretty sure there was a fire alarm of some kind that went off? (It did wake me up, but I was able to hear my family and know it wasn't a real emergency so rather than wake up, I went back to sleep.) And then there were countless endless phone calls from scammers that just wouldn't give up, apparently. Dozens upon dozens of calls.

​And my father breaking things I think also happened. Basically my family was loud. Very loud. So they woke me up, repeatedly. (Also, needing to go to the bathroom meant not as restful sleep as it should be.)

So I was still dead tired today.

Better! My plan almost worked. Not hallucinating!

But still not great.

​Anyway, cat is very comfy, sleeping, so I could keep going but I'll wrap this blog up now so that when she hops down I can sprint straight for bed without any delay.
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    rBree2

    AKA:
    RangerBree2
    ​rangerbreenew

    Just your average blogger. A transwoman lesbian, with autism, adhd, anxiety, and bipolar disorder, who is plural (a polyfrag median system).

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