All Too Human
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Rambles, Rants, and Musings

Well, still don't remember what I wanted to say.

6/24/2015

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...But that's okay. I think I'll live. Right now, I'm looking over the Rogues Gallery I've made for Ruby, and I'm liking what I'm seeing. I've got a fairly decent balance of foes for her to fight, from magical to supernatural to entirely mundane, all of which I see as filling in a lot of the fights I need. I could probably use at least one or two more, focusing on different fighting methods and/or elemental magic (I've only got two or three that explicitly use elemental magic right now, and most of my current foes don't use a specific weapon), but otherwise, I like the wide variety I've cooked up.

They just seem to fit so...so...well, in a superhero world. (Which means there's a fair balance between punny villain names like Paul T.R. Geist, and villain names that have no obvious meaning whatsoever, just being their name, and grand monikers.)

Incidentally, the number I currently have? Ten. Totally coincidental, but I love the symmetry and the dynamics present. (It helps that there are at least three on the list which the heroes would be willing to work with on occasion, given the right circumstances, potentially more, if they are desperate.)
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Consequences of a busy work day:

6/24/2015

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I had something I really, REALLY wanted to talk about earlier.

Unfortunately, I was swamped with work. So by the time I was able to write it down, I had long-since forgotten what it could have been.

And, ahg, that sucks, because with that gone, I've got nothing.

Maybe about the dreams I had earlier? I dunno.

Right now, I want to finish listening to the five at five and then take a nap. That's about it. Maybe it'll come back to me, but probably not.

We'll see what I can produce today if anything.
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That took less time than expected.

6/23/2015

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I've been wanting to hide the useless About page (which I had no need for, since this blog is fairly self-explanatory) and the Contact page (which I've no need for, because I don't want to give out contact info), and add in a page that I could eventually release Red Hood Rider pages on. If the blog editor worked (which I think it did), then I accomplished that in about thirty seconds.

Go me! (But in this case, weebly gets most of the credit, for once not being useless.)
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Well, no TKD today...

6/23/2015

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...And I gave the computer I do my gaming stuff on (not to mention, do my scans on) to my mom, meaning that for the majority of today, I've been doing stuff like catching up on anime.

I'll probably continue doing that, though I may play around with the possibility of messing around with the blog a little bit. (Not too much, though. Don't want to break something.)

Incidentally, I also noticed that today's exactly one month away from my birthday, so let's see how much work I can get done before then.
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This is HARD.

6/23/2015

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It's gonna be a nightmare to draw if I'm having this much trouble with just the scriptwriting. Basically, I'm balancing exposition with a fight scene, using a narration box as the fight progresses. Yet making an interesting fight is proving to be a challenge. I have all these cool scenes planned out in my mind for fights, yet they in practical terms would take a few panels at most to display, making the fights much shorter than they should be.

I mean, fights in manga last chapters, plural, more often than not. I'm having trouble dragging the fight I'm currently working on out, without it getting repetitive. How do they manage so easily to keep the fight interesting? I need to figure an answer out for that fast, since this is excruciatingly painful to deal with.

...Still, in spite of the forced progress, I have a fair idea of what I'm going for, and I think the finishing length after all the exposition will be at around standard manga chapter length, ~30-40 pages or so. (The 'episode' is basically broken up into three parts: fight, aftermath, and aftermath of the aftermath. Character exposition is for the fight, worldbuilding is for the aftermath, and a little bit of both with the hook ending is there for the final part.)
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Let's see if we can fit a second blog in today!

6/22/2015

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How hard could it be to do in 25 minutes? (Oh boy.)

Anyway, I've been busy doing some fairly productive stuff. Totally slacked off on my mafia errands (that's gonna tick some people off, especially if they read my now much-more-public blog, to which, I say, I'm sorry, I'm a total liar), but it's worth it.

I got a TON of reference images on the pink power ranger. They ranged from alright to absolutely AWESOME, with two DeviantART users in particular having amazing art. (The one that I'm mostly referring to, though, is this one. Like...just...wow. WOW. Just wow.)

When it comes to Kagome...not so much. I'm sure if I entered the right keyword into the search, I'd get gold. No such luck with mine; I got a single nugget with variants on 'Kagome Inu-Yasha' and 'Kagome Inu-Yasha bow' and the like, because while there were a few showing her with a bow, none of them were particularly, well, y'know, helpful, and there was a LOT of clutter (fanart, cosplays) that made the search be less helpful.

Ah, well.

I did manage to continue on the drawing, though. I'm still not happy with it, but I'm calling it finished. (I'll need to get it scanned, but no way am I doing that in my timeframe, so you'll have to see it some time tomorrow at the earliest.) I need to move on to the next page. (The plan is for me to do all the first 'episode' on paper, then digitize it all, rather than digitizing one page at a time.) And begin scripting more, since while I have a fairly solid idea about the ending of the chapter, the fight sequence which makes up the middle exposition (the current bit I'm scripting), I don't have nearly as much done on. (It's mainly what they're doing that's proving a challenge; how do I draw the fight out? That's the question I need to answer. I also need the exact dialog after a certain point.)

I also did a little bit of villain work. I've mentally been compiling a bit of a Rogues Gallery in my head, so I've started writing some of them out. The list is a bit longer than I thought, and I'm not happy with how hollow some of the entries there are, nor with the limited selection (some of them are the same), so I've still got more to create, but I'm working on it. (Basically, one of the major things I need are people who work in an organization rather than as an individual, and big villains able to team up, with some overlap. I've only got a little bit of that right now.)

Wish me luck. Villain creation is just as hard as hero creation. Harder, actually. (This being a Rogues Gallery, rather than villain of the week, I need to make them also be such that you can see why they're repeating enemies of Ruby's. In spite of the fact that they were defeated the first time and Ruby just keeps growing stronger and villains of the week are credible for the single appearance they make wherever that is chronologically. Basically, I need villains who are of Joker-to-Batman caliber, rather than one-offs. Yet so far, I've only got a few quirky cliched ones.) So I'll need that luck.
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This week's gonna SUCK.

6/22/2015

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As evident by today. Downside, ton of people, no rest, and all kids, meaning they're at constant risk of doing something stupid.
Upside, at least they have a ton of competent swim instructors looking after them.
Downside, fair number of them are new.
Upside, so far things are looking fairly good.
Downside, I was scheduled to work alone for a significant section of the shift, something that's frankly impossible.
Upside, someone volunteered to help and we raised awareness of the issue for the rest of the week.

It's overall neither better nor worse than normal, just being...well, different. Yet exhausting.

In positive news, a couple of my coworkers gave me hope for humanity. I didn't get to catch nearly as much of their conversation as I wanted to, because I was busy working at the time (as mentioned, I was busy working the entire day), but they were mainly talking about two subjects. One was religion, and how the best way is the way of having a choice, essentially. The other was covering transgendered individuals, and it was them discussing how bad it is for people to intentionally not address them as they want to be addressed as. (I think you can tell why I was interested. Little would they know......)

I mean, it helps that I think one of them may be non-binary in their gender (I caught what sounded like them saying as much in their conversation, but I'm not absolutely sure), butstill, them openly talking about such a thing, hitting all the right points, made me immensely happy and I was disappointed that I only got to be there for a couple minutes.
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A quick bit of (maybe) nonsense:

6/21/2015

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So not gonna have much time today, as my writeup from last night (which you're going to see mere moments before this) briefly explained, thanks to the holiday.

But I should have the time to quickly point out an odd irony I found myself realizing when staring at a few coins. Basically, in spite of it being in our Constitution, our government has a fair amount of support behind antidisestablishmentarianism.

"...What."

No, hear me out! Yes, it's a little bit of a stretch, which is why I called it an odd irony, but it exists. Think about something that most school children have to recite. I mean, I, personally, never once in my life, actually have recited it (was too young in Spirit Ridge, and too much a rebel in Dutch Hill--basically, the idea of saluting a flag seemed stupid, and in my adulthood, I continue that belief; governments exist to serve the people, not the other way around, so I refuse to pledge myself to the government as it is), but think about the lyrics to the Pledge of Allegiance:
One nation, under God.
This is something that, again. In virtually every public school. They tell people to recite. To pledge, effectively, underneath God, to serve. (Like I said, I'm against the idea. I believe in the American dream, not the American reality.)

But the real thing that got me thinking was our currency. It all says the same thing: In God We Trust.

It's probably in a bunch of other places, too. (I think it might be present in courts, too, where you swear under oath of God? Not entirely positive, but I think it is.) I know that traditional presidential inaugurations have had the president be sworn under oath of the bible, too.

So in spite of living in a country that allegedly separates church and state, there's a ton of stuff that ties the state to the church.

It's a stretch, though, because 'God' doesn't necessarily mean 'church', and vice-versa, butstill, all the same, it makes you think, right?

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June 20th, 2015

6/21/2015

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I'm really an idiot when it comes to my blog. There's so many things that I was intending to do for it, yet here I am, past midnight, without having typed any of it. Sorry for my incompetence.

Tomorrow (or today, depending on your viewpoint, but certainly not mine) is Father's Day, which'll mean no blog then, and here I am, failing on my blog today.
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My productive Friday, part two:

6/19/2015

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So I figured I had more to talk about than complain about the downsides of a quite frankly privileged life, leading me to begin writing this. I'll start with something I suspected back on Wednesday, had my suspicions grow yesterday, and had confirmed today: the reason for my sleepiness is in fact that I'm sick.

It's nothing serious. The main symptom is my nose being more runny than normal. (I get runny noses all the time even when not sick, mainly after eating food. Family curse.) And maybe sneezing slightly more than normal. (I sneeze all the time even when not sick, especially after eating food or contact with sunlight. Much stronger family curse. Blame genetics.)

But I've noticed a minor, weak, occasional dry cough, different from my normal not-sick (fairly wet) cough. (I cough even when not sick, to clear the accumulated junk in my throat. Yeah, I think you can see why I don't really recognize being sick until I'm sick; most of the common symptoms are things that my body naturally, harmlessly, without any viruses causing problems, will do.) I'm talking an average of less than one cough an hour. Maybe even three or four. (So, 3/6/12 a day would be my guess.) Unless I agitate it, with things like laughter or the wrong emphasis in speech.

So not a definite giveaway. But a sign. The true tell is my throat. It's not sore...but it's getting there. (Edit: much stronger, in fact.) Pre-sore-throat. To describe it, nothing hurts/agitates/bothers the throat (edit: still true, so still not yet a full sore throat, but getting there). However, while food goes down just fine, it's tender to the touch of water, meaning I feel it every time I swallow, albeit subtly and so minorly that it's almost not a problem. (Edit: getting worse, though.) It's beginning to feel like a clump, yet isn't yet one. (Edit: okay, so while the clump's not fully complete yet, I'd say it's more a clump than not a clump at this point.)

So basically, yes I'm sick, but it's so minor as to be almost nonexistent. (Edit: still consider this true, by the way. Minor sore throat is nothing serious. Other symptoms faded, too, so it's just the throat to watch.) The main thing I need to counter it is sleep, lots of it, which I got frustratingly little of last night (probably the reason for the sickness)--and not through lack of trying. I went to bed at 12:30. Half an hour window to fall asleep is plenty, no?

...As it turns out, "No" is exactly right, because it wasn't. (Ironically enough, one of the things that bothered me was the dilemma between hour-early, hour-late I had this morning, since it was during this time last night I thought of it. Blasted unnecessary paranoia, making me worry for nothing.)

My watch alarm beeping at 1:00 told me I'd wasted half an hour trying. The watch alarm wasn't interrupting anything. (It's too quiet to do that, anyway. My mind's numbed it out. The only time I can hear it is when my hearing's super-sensitive...which it can only be if I am fully awake.)

I was wide awake the entire half hour, thinking at an entirely normal way and rate, with only willpower keeping my eyelids shut. (In fact, they may have opened a couple of times. The urge to look was strong, but I kept them shut saying, "Shut up! You need to sleep! So don't open your eyes, idiot!" ...No luck.)

I  just...could. not. get. to. sleep. It was one of THOSE nights. I'm sure we've all had them, so you know the type. Where no matter the strategy, you simply cannot rest. Where you feel like you sense everything around you in real-time, an indicator of not-sleeping-at-all. I felt like I never fell asleep at all, even though the dreams I had tell me I eventually managed somehow. (Was still fairly restless, though.) The dreams were nice, though I've forgotten why, yet I knew once my mom woke me up, I needed more.

The half-hour nap I took was ten times more restful, but that's probably thanks to the things I was thinking/dreaming about. (Not sure which. I had more control than in most dreams, but had at times a clearly altered mindset with me phasing out of this world, losing awareness of my surroundings, the feeling I didn't get during the night, like a dream.)

Basically, I rotated through three situations. I briefly covered the 'realistic' (note the marks) one, "What if I, a short time ago, had begun actively transitioning?". In it, I covered the logistics of it, when the most probable point would be, and such. This being fantasy, though, my family was there to support the change. (I say "realistic", because it's realistic in comparison to the other two. No way would my family ever be as loving and caring as dream-them was.)

The second one was a, "What if I suddenly became a girl?" scenario. Obviously, I would be happy. That's what I want, after all. I hate my body, and fully, truly, wish I was born a girl rather than a guy. Problem with this wish is...well, it's in our world that I see it. Not some world where magic is common like the Rubyverse. As in, a world where (as far as we know) there are no magical powers at all. And suddenly, magically, I'm a girl.

How would everyone react to the sudden, magical, change, when magic doesn't even exist? (Outside of, apparently, existing long enough to grant my wish to be a biological girl.) I'd be the same person, only happier. Yet how could I ever explain my situation to people? (This plus the above one is good training, though, because there's an obvious real-life parallel, because in effect, ideally, this is what actually would happen. So it was a good exercise to run my mind through a bit.)

The third sort-of remedied that problem, but introduced a new one in the process, by instead acting as a RetCon: "What if I was granted my wish of being born female, but retained all my (male) memories prior to the point I made the wish?" a la, the Misfile situation, only instead of an unwanted accident, something intentional and desired. (Sort-of.) That one was fairly interesting, and I basically covered how my life would be similar and different, with me as a fairly masculine (but still having plenty of feminine aspects) young lady.

Was definitely a fun escape from the harsh reality that is my true life. Anyway, that typed up, it's sleepytimez.


(Edit: having gone through my second nap of the day, my sore throat has gotten worse, but other symptoms improved. I had a few good dreams, but the only one I can remember is the actor who played Commander Riker in Star Trek--his name slips my mind right now--doing commentary, basically introducing us to a 1994 Independent Film called Starbuck, and the commentary he was doing was basically on the basic premise of the film, how it covers the borders between reality and fiction, with graphics involving video games, but him stating there's more to it than that. In hindsight, that dream was...fairly meta, all things considered. Enjoyed it, but now I need to take a third nap to see if I can beat the cold entirely.)
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    rangerbreenew

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